Two down, ???? to go

     Hi again!  I'm back for the second installment of A Fatherhood Instruction Manual!  Two in a row!  Woo who!
    I want to start by thanking everyone that commented or even just read my first installment.  It helped me to realize just how blessed I am to have people around me that will take time from their busy days to read my musings.  You people are the best!
     Okay now, back to me.
     When I last wrote, I promised I would release details about myself so you can see if my advice is worth the computer screen it is written on - well actually, computer screens are quite expensive so that cliche doesn't update well.  Poop.  I promised I would release details about myself so  you can see if my advice is worth a plug nickle.  Okay, what is a plug nickle?  Can anyone tell me?  ... so you can see if my advice is worth a three dollar bill...  Aw to heck with it.  Let's just get to a question.  My in-box was loaded with fathers seeking my amateur, Monday morning quarterbacking advice - in my dreams.  So here is another made up question;

Dear Dad Dude,
      How am I supposed to write to you with a question if you never gave us an email address?
-Dumbfounded in Delaware

Dear Dumb,
     Good question!  How did you mail it to me this time?  Telepathy?  Got it.  From now on and to avoid mental errors (mental telepathy errors, that is) here is a valid email address you can use to write me;  daddude@wi.rr.com

Okay, now an actual fake question...

Dear Dad Dude,
     My 5 year-old daughter threw an unholy conniption fit in the grocery store this morning because I refused to buy her some Dipsey Doodles.  I tried to be nice, then I threatened her, but I finally had to give in and get her the dern Dipsey Doodles.  How can I prevent this behavior in the future?
P-Oed in Poughkeepsie
    
Dear P,
     Wow, haven't we all been there.  Here's the thing.  It may not feel like it but you ended up taking the path of least resistance.  When being a dad, the PLR is almost always the wrong path.  First you didn't set your expectations and consequences ahead of time.  Second, you made an idle threat. And third (and worst of all) you gave in after you said no because she turned up the heat..
     In order to modify your daughter's behavior, you must first modify your own.  Before you ever go into the store, tell your daughter what you expect out of her and what will happen if your expectations are not met.  Be realistic, because if your expectations are not met, you absolutely must follow through with your threat.  If you don't, you are just whistling in the wind.  Above all, if whining and screaming occur - by your daughter, do not give in.  If you do, then you are telling her that whining and screaming work and to please do it again whenever she wants something.
    This is not an easy solution.  She has learned - from you - that these tactics are fruitful.  She now has to unlearn what you taught her earlier (not everything we teach is intentional) and learn what you are now teaching her.  It will be very rough at first, but as she learns the new rules, she will test them less and less.  Good luck my friend!  I recommend cranking the mp3 player!


That's it!  Another installment in the can. If you read it and even kind of liked it, send a link to everyone you ever heard of!   Also, please know that I am in no way trained in family counseling or am I a doctor or any kind of relationship professional.  Agree or not - the choice is 100% yours!
 
     Thanks for reading!

Write your questions to; daddude@wi.rr.com